solo mama entendre

I’ve been reading a lot of blogs over the past few weeks because my own creativity has gone on sabbatical. Two blog characteristics that have jumped out to me, which are not rocket science, but interesting to a new blogger like myself are:

1. Blogs that state a specific problem in the title that I would like to solve for my own life

2. Blogs that promise 5 (or any specific quantity) things that will make my life better in some way. I would love to tag some of those blogs I’ve read recently to give props to those bloggers, but I’m still trying to figure out a) how to do that, and b) how to do it with the proper credit given. I’m sure I will get there after reading some more blogs. Because how cool is it when you can just click on a blue word or phrase in someone’s blog and immediately be transported to more awesome reading!

So herein lies the topic of today’s blog. Three (3) blog titles using quantities and promising solutions to real life problems that would really appeal to me:

1. 5 Creative and Seemingly Humane Responses to Distract Your Child From Wanting to Visit Every Public Restroom You Encounter

This blog would really appeal to me. Especially when we are eating out (which happens more frequently than I would like to admit). My children don’t really have to go to the bathroom as much as they say. They just like to visit public restrooms. It is really awkward when your kid is pestering you to use the bathroom and you are saying “Not now honey” or “Wait until I’ve had a chance to eat a few bites” or “You just went 2 minutes ago” and you are under the watchful eyes and ears of the public. They think you are cruel for not acquiescing to your child’s pleas to use the bathroom, but you know better. Once you get in there, your child will crouch down and look under each stall door, unravel rolls of toilet paper, and pretend to wash their hands for 20 minutes without expelling a single drop of pee.

2. 5 Quick Meals For the School/Work Week That Don’t Involve Cooking, Preparation, or Ingredients Ending with “Oxite” or “No. 5”

I just want something natural and nutritious that slides out of a recyclable cardboard box. Seriously. I’ve scanned hundreds (tens) of sites that proclaim “easy” “quick” “your kids will love this” “uses ingredients you already have at home” etc. bla bla bla. Because the truth is, if it is something that is usually found in the standard household (flour, milk, eggs) then chances are, I have run out or I never had it in the first place. I’m tired when I get home. I have a government job that operates like a start-up company, working with really ornery clients. Give me something easy. EASY.

3. 5 Things You Can Do Today That Will Make You a Happier, More Energetic, Positive and Present Human for Your Children

This is a tough one. But I would click on that title. Because I never run out of hope that this article, blog, editorial, essay, could be THE ONE that provides the answer to the above stated issue. Now that my daughter has learned how to string the following words together, “I don’t like you” and my son never tires of saying, “You are the meanest momma in the universe,” I wish I could be THE MOM that always has a great craft project up her sleeve (and the necessary supplies already at home stored neatly in a brightly colored bin), or the right words to say when your child has bitten, scratched or hit a “friend” right in front of you on a play date. The fact that I am not that mom speaks to my lack of sleep, a hectic work schedule, and a never-ending cycle of providing every aspect of care to my single-parented children. If you want to score some big points across the world with every kind of parent, a blog with this title would be the Holy Grail. You could even charge people just to click on it. I would pay.

So there you have it. Three (3) appealing blog ideas which make effective use of quantities in their titles and promise to solve very real and very difficult issues that almost every parent faces or will face at some point. Tag me in your blog if you decide you’d like to tackle one of these anytime soon (and include instructions about how to tag, please).